"I Am Not Forgotten [Even When I Am]
I don’t know about you but there are times in my life where I feel forgotten...
Forgotten by friends who don’t call or email or text to see how I’m doing...
And these instances of feeling forgotten tend to drag me back to a painful past of being told I wasn’t worth remembering...
Oh how excruciating that pain of being forgotten has been familiar to my frail and wounded heart.
And the Lord knows how desperately I have wanted to numb that pain in the past...
Of course many things changed drastically after giving my life to Jesus. Just the liberty of knowing I wasn’t going to hell due to my inability to measure up to God’s standard was enough to distract me from those hurting craters of my heart.
But the need to be validated by someone else lingered on...
... I was looking to others to fill voids, validate me, and determine my joy, peace, and worth rather than Him.
That is where this painful but growth-oriented journey of allowing Him to fill any voids in my heart began for me.
And as I walk (sometimes crawl) along this journey I am realizing how God is purposefully orchestrating my relationships and schedule to bring me to that place of complete dependence on and expectation in Him.
Family and friends don’t communicate?
My expectation is from Him.
My husband doesn’t surprise me with love notes and gifts?
My expectation is from Him.
People don’t respond on Twitter or read/comment on my blog?
My expectation is from Him.
And while there have been so many times in this season that my heart breaks at how forgotten I feel, God continues to remind me every single time that I am not forgotten (by Him) even when I am (by people)."
And so this was so timely, at a time when, as we struggle, good friends come alongside. They email. They text. They drop by.
I am so grateful for them.
Others, who we had thought were our friends, seem unconcerned.
Yes, it hurts. BUT GOD IS ENOUGH! ENOUGH! ENOUGH!
Thank you, dear Ayla!
Oh bless you sweet sister. Thank you for your kind words.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry that you have felt abandoned by others; I know the pain that comes from that but am thankful that the pain serves a purpose-to bring us closer to a God who never abandons. I know it's had to see that purpose; it was for me too until you commented and shared how God used my pain to encourage you in the middle of a similiar trial.
I will keep you and your husband lifted up to the Lord during this time and pray that you would experience His matchless and supernatural love in a mighty way in this season.
Jesus love and blessings.